My mum was the first to confirm if I had not taken some kind of intoxicating drugs to knock me off my senses. She quickly drew me aside and snatched my well packed bags. We stood there for a while, staring at each others face for some couple of minutes before she made the first attempt and spoke out.
"Nadia are you OK? Are you having any mental... You know, issues?"
I attempted to say something but she added quickly;
"It's just a divorce, Nadia. It's not the end of life. Are you planning of running mad because of this? I didn’t even like that Wilson to begin with."
I took my time, used lots of grammar to try and convince her, but it just didn’t work.
Next, she consulted my father and brother; she asked them to look into the matter. I wasn't making any headway. So finally, I had to lie to them that I was just trying to pull their legs. I understood the point they were trying to make: How can a medical doctor just wake up one morning and abandon such a professional career just to become a cook? Who does that? I had no better alternative than to lie to them that I was going to spend a month with Flora, just to clear my head a little.
After much persuasion, they finally allowed me to leave the house. I was meters away from Benin City to Lagos when the lie expired.
"Nadia, where are you for God's sake?"
My mother’s voice rang in my ears.
"On my way to Lagos, mum."
I heard her scream. The line went off the next second; I’m pretty much sure the phone might have fallen from her hands. I quickly switched my phone off because I was sure the next callers would be my dad, my brother, my uncle, and probably the entire extended family, trying to talk Nadia out of this; but I was certain of what I wanted to do and my mind was already made up.
"I love you, sweetie!"
The girl beside me caught my attention with the phone call she was making. She was talking to her lover or husband, I suppose. I remembered that was the last words I told Wilson before he ate my poison. Well don't blame me, but for that single reason, I hated the girl sitting next to me to the extent that I felt like pulling her tongue out of her throat. I couldn't help it.
She dropped the call and caught me staring at her like a wounded lion; she was startled that her phone initially fell from her hands.
"Hello, good afternoon."
She greeted nervously, and adjusted her sitting position a little farther from me. She made sure her cornered eyes never left my position, just in case I decided to strike.
The bus stopped suddenly. What was going on?
"Driver, wetin happen nah...?"
"Which kind wahala be this self?"
The passengers shouted at the driver until he could no longer bear it; he screamed back.
"No be the motor I dey try do so?! Abeg una go come down make we push am small."
Chai! I bit my finger. I left my car behind because of my mum’s suspicions. God, why now? Why did you lead me to this kind of public transport?
"Madam, abeg come down make we push dis thing; no dey form ajebo for here..."
One of the dark huge passengers lashed at me. I dare not reply. His baritone and size intimidated me already. I simply came down and acted like I was pushing with all my strength.
"Madam push dis thing, you no dey push anything. You think say nah your AC car you dey?"
Same man again, what was his issue with me?
I opened my mouth again, but his muscular arms made me swallow my saliva along with the words I had, down my throat. I needed to think, I had no back up, my family was not even in support of my journey, so let me just mind my business and condole the rubbish.
The bus started, hallelujah! Only to break down four more times before we got to Lagos. I was seriously stressed out.
I found it difficult to locate the place I was going to till late in the evening. It was boldly written, "SERENA FOODIES". Wow, my name sake!
My face beamed with smiles. The house was transparent; I could see lots of people with bags just like myself, going to and fro. I could spot some cooks in their costumes, some other persons in suit... I guess those were the supervisors. Without wasting much time, I hurried in. I could see almost everyone going into a particular section; after few minutes, they came out with toothpicks and some well packed food.
Thank goodness... I was starving. I quickly searched through my purse and hurried in. I had to gasp at the sight, It was exquisite. The counter was crystal built; the food selection was arrayed on a tray that was on rotation. I hurried there only to notice the person in charge glancing through her phone. It took her few minutes to raise her head and listen to me... I don’t blame her.
"Just take your pick, it’s free for new interns."
Her words sent my stomach ablaze; you know how Nigerians react to that slogan: ‘FOC (FREE OF CHARGE)’!?
Without wasting time, I filled my plate with a combination of different types of food I have never had in my life, despite my extravagant lifestyle. I made sure it was stocked with meats of different kinds: Chicken suya wrap, toasted turkey, toasted snail and fried chicken.
I noticed people giving me that weird look, but I didn't care. I dived into my food and ate every last crumb. When I was certain my stomach couldn't take more, I tried my best and pulled myself up.
Meters away, I heard the announcement;
“All new interns should report to the hall."
I quickly joined the crowd and hurried there.
A woman in suit stood on a podium with a microphone attached to it. I could tell she wore a very expensive cologne, judging from the way she stood with pride in her eyes. Who is she self, the president’s wife?
We settled down on the seats provided. Despite the crowd, we all fitted into the hall with lots of space left to cover.
“I welcome you all to Serena foodies. I believe you all came here with one goal in mind: To become professional cooks."
Her words slowly went faint in my ears; my stomach was trying to have revenge on me... I had eaten way too much. I seriously needed to gas out, and I was 100% sure that it would create a massive confusion. I shut my eyes and tried to notice the people sitting next to me. Gosh! Both sides where cute, handsome guys. I broke out in sweat; the more I tightened my ass to push it in, the more it came back in full force. I used my jotter to try and breeze my tummy, but it still wouldn't listen. The guy on my left side stared at me with a question;
"Are you okay, Miss?"
I was shocked when he spoke, but I quickly forced a smile.
"Yes! I am... I am... why wouldn't I be?"
I replied nervously.
I guess God sent him, cos the moment I tried to force a laughter, my worst nightmare escaped through my ass and exploded into the atmosphere.
Continued on next page...
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